“Just Dance” Part II

Tank tops.  Yup, the more I think about it the more I am sure the “Just Dancing” is going to be a major obstacle in the opportunity to ever wear a tank top again.  Not that my age isn’t already screwing things up with my summer top selection.   I am at that age where for some unknown reason the upper arm flab wants to make its way to the floor.   It use to hug itself around my upper arm bone for dear life.  Now it has just let go and when I put my arm up it jiggles and sags.  Not a pretty sight.  Anyway, after my first disastrous “Just Dance” session when I scored a 19% ‘Great’ on the short version of “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun”, I had to think this whole process through.  I really had to try and figure out the game plan (pun intended) of this dancing game.  Now I admit I am not the brightest bulb on a string of Christmas lights, but I really to try to understand some of this modern technology.   Actually, I must be blinking Christmas light because sometimes I get it and sometimes I just don’t.  Here is my “Just Dance” thought process.  I am holding the controller in my right hand.   I am holding the controller for a reason.  The reason must be that the motion sensor mounted on the TV.  The motion sensor must be picking up motion from the controller in my right hand. PAUSE:  How am I doing so far?   Am I getting this all right?  PLAY:  The motion sensor is scoring my ‘Dance’ based on the fact that I have the controller in the right place at the right time.  Therefore, in order to get a higher percentage of ‘Greats’, my right hand has to be in the right place at the right time.  I have already figured out that if doesn’t really matter what my feet are doing.  What I haven’t figured out is what Max Combo’s are.  I thought a ‘Max Combo’ was having your feet and your arms both in the right place at the right time.  But that can’t be it because I have scored a ‘Max Combo’ and I can guarantee that my arms and legs were never in sync.  Plus I don’t have a controller strapped to my so how would the motion sensor even know what I was doing with my feet.  As you can see I am still “blinking” confused about ‘Max Combos.’  Now I am ready to actually physically try this “Just Dance” game again.  This is when I run into the next big problem.  I takes me FOREVER to get the controller icon on the 32″ TV screen much less click on the correct play icons.  I admit, I have my generation issues with the hand/eye coordination.  Some of you have seen me in action with a computer mouse.  I am even more pathetic with the Wii controller.  I am looping my arms up, down, across, over, back, forth, under and around until I finally can even see a moving triangle icon on the TV screen.  Once I get the icon in the right place I hold perfectly still so I can scroll through the song list.  This all takes long-stand-there-doing-nothing minutes which can’t be good in any exercise program.  I thought if I could play Wii for 30 minutes a day that would certainly fit into my schedule.   That is a laugh.  If I have to add 5 minutes in between each short song version there ends up to be a lot of standing around time and not a lot of calories are getting burned in 30 minutes.  Nevertheless, I am determined to try this again.  Thinking the game plan through as I did made me realize that I have to put an extra emphasis on whatever my right hand, thus my right arm, is doing.   In my mind, in order to raise the percentage of ‘Greats’ I have to over exaggerate every right hand move.  The second time through the song I am putting all my strength behind my right arm.   When I am suppose to put my right arm straight up in the air, I punch it up in the air with such a force my upper arm flab is jiggling up a storm. And so it goes with every right hand mirrored move.  My right arm is getting the workout of its life.  After my much increased right arm effort, I scored a 23% ‘Great’, a 25% ‘OK” and 48% ‘X’s.’  [Hey, check my math.  It will be good for you]  23% is still very low on a grading scale.  48% means I am missing the moves 1/2 the time.  25% means 1/4 of the time I am just OK.  So now I have this vision that my right arm is going to become this totally chiseled muscular appealing appendage.  While my left arm is going to continue to have the old-lady-upper-arm-sagging-flab look that we all have an aversion for.  And how will that look in a tank top?  One arm will be nice hard defined muscle and twice the size of the jiggly sagging arm. People will take one look at me in my tank top and say……”Look at her, she must exercise with the Wii.”

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One Response to “Just Dance” Part II

  1. Mandy Learn says:

    OMG.. I bought the Wii and a dance game for the same reason! After a pretty similar experience,.. well it sits in a box. Ugh! 250 dollars down the drain, I might as well joined a gym. I feel your pain Aunt Mickey, I have said, “when it comes to exercising, I would rather scrub the bathroom!”.. My mom did not pass on the “exercise high” gene on to me.

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