Thanks to the imminent danger of Global Warming I had to shovel 2-5 inches off my driveway yet again. Last weekend I splurged and bought one of those snow shovels on wheels. Geez, a snow shovel on wheels, I wish I would have thought of that! Luckily for me our hardware store had some for sale already assembled. God only knows what part of my body would have gotten hurt or what part of my house would have gotten damaged if I would have had to assemble it myself. Just that other day my Dad had to help me replace a light switch. I turned off 4 breakers just to be sure I was getting the right one. Needless to say half way through the hookup we saw sparks, so evidently I didn’t get the right breaker shut off. I can blame my ex for that. He is the one that labeled the breaker box. Also, I have to climb up on the washing machine to get to the breaker box. This means after I eventually turned off the right breakers and jumped down from the washing machine, I landed on the dryer door. Why the dryer door was open I have no idea. But now the dryer door doesn’t stay shut when I try to dry a load of clothes. This dryer door problem happened before, but at that time I had this perfect chair that I could press up against the dryer door to keep the door shut the and the dryer going. Unfortunately, I threw the chair away. So now I have rigged up this heavy box of magazines, with a piece of trim board and an old towel. It looks pretty idiotic, (well I guess it actually is idiotic) but I can keep drying clothes which is of key importance. It is not like I have the option to hang clothes outside. Anyway, this snow blade is GREAT! No surprise that I am having trouble flipping it around. Ideally you make a swipe across the driveway, flip the shovel around and swipe back across the other way. When I try to flip the shovel, it double flips on me for some reason. The results of double flipping are these little snow trials that have to be shoveled up extra. One time when I tried to singularly flip the shovel the handle of the shovel ended up over my head. I can’t even begin to explain how that happened but I can only hope not too many of the neighbors were watching. The other problem I have with the shovel is that pushing the snow to either side of the driveway cuts down on the driveway size each time I shovel. Good thing I stared with a 3 pad driveway. Today, I officially gave up on keeping the 3rd pad clear of snow. It was either give up or use a regular shovel to throw the snow 4 feet into the air to get it piled up onto the drift on the north side of the driveway. I can only hope that spring will come before I am left with a single narrow trail for my car to drive out of the garage. But speaking of cars, I had to get gas today. OMG, $3.24 for unleaded. That means $3.19 for unleaded plus Ethanol. I personally stay away from Ethanol because when it burns in my car it sometimes emits a strange odor. Well, not a strange odor. It smells exactly like rotten eggs. I asked the service department guy about this and he said that this is a common problem. I don’t believe him. I think my car has deeper emissions issues. I have never driven with anyone else whose car smells like it let a fart. I was at the drive up at Wendys the other day and the guy at the window asked me what was wrong with my car because it stank so badly? I told him that my car had some sort of “gas” problems. He replied…..”Sure, blame it on the car.” I was so embarrassed. The guy probably was thinking I shouldn’t be eating anymore food if I was capable of that magnitude of my own gas release. BTW, I drive a 2010 Toyota Corolla. You know the ones that have been recalled several times for speeding up when you put on the brakes. I think I am going to file my own complaint that the car farts when you step on the gas. I wonder if there will be some financial compensation. Anyway, let’s get back to the price of gas. I noticed when I drove away from the gas station that $3.19 in the rearview mirror looks like PIE. Immediately I thought of the government feeding us subliminal messages about needing a bigger piece of the “pie.” I mean like those secret messages you get when you play the Beatles songs backwards. The government is using the same tactic. With the government in debt for trillions of dollars they have to appeal to our subconscious mind. They somehow have to convince us that we don’t mind paying more money for food, more money for gas, more money for heat, rent, electricity…..actually more money for everything. There is no way any of us are going to consciously pay more taxes. We all know that when the government talks about our economic situation we have to put our boots on and start shoveling. And I don’t mean snow!