A Gazillion Gadgets

My classmate Ken brought up a very good point about pushing buttons.  Young people today have no fear with it comes to pushing buttons.  I do admire that trait in a person.  Rapidly pushing buttons definitely looks technologically savvy.  I am especially impressed with the kids that can text on a number pad. I know this is already old-school texting, but it was impressive.  These kids had to keep track of the number of times they pushed the key as well as the choice of 3 different letters, the message they were sending, and the spelling.  (OK not the spelling)  Some of these same kids were my library aides.  I couldn’t believe how mortified they were when I asked them to keep the fiction books in alphabetical order.  After I gave them the assignment they would look around the library.  I knew what they were looking for.  They were looking for an Alphabet chart that hangs in every elementary school classroom.   Of course there wasn’t one hanging in the high school library, so I think some of them would sing the Alphabet Song in their minds while they were doing this task.   My problem is that there are just too many gadgets.  I take totally responsibility for the inability to keep them all straight.  Here are some things I have learned over the years:

1.)    I cannot use any of the remote controls as a calculator of a telephone

2.)    Likewise, I can’t change the channel on the TV with a telephone or a calculator

3.)    The automatic car door opener does not also open the house door automatically.

4.)    My cell phone doesn’t change channels on the TV.

5.)    However, my cell phone can be a tip calculator after I press a series of buttons at least 14 times.  Although, I usually calculate a tip according to what change I have in my purse.

6.)    My cell phone is not a mouse for the computer.  When I work on the compute (like now when I am posting a blog) I usually remember to take my cell phone with me to the computer room.   Since I am right handed I lay the phone on the right side of the desk.  This means when I grab for the mouse I end up grabbing for my cell phone instead.  I usually slide it around a few times before I realize it is not the mouse.

7.)    Luckily my house phone has a “locate headset” button incase I forget where I laid the phone down.  I am happy to say it is just one button to push.  When I push the button the phone makes this alarming noise that seems to scream……hurry, come find me!  I appreciate this “one” button except when I leave the phone outside in the summer time. Then my neighbor has to come over and tell me my phone is making a loud weird noise outside and could I stop disrupting life in the entire neighborhood.

8.)    The alarm clock needs to know if I want to get up a d 6:00 AM or 6:00 PM.  That seems to make a huge difference in any attempt to get to work on time.  Likewise, it needs to know if I want to wake up to the radio, music or nature sounds.  Failure to choose results in an extremely annoying bleeping sound.   A sound that will greet me when get out of the shower because I didn’t shut off the snooze button when I finally did decide to get up out of bed.

9.)    The microwave needs to know if I am cooking something or just defrosting something.  Actually I think this is a joke.   I have yet to defrost a steak that hasn’t come out partially cooked on the ends.  Unfortunately, these “cooked ends” end up being the most unappetizing brown color.   Also, I have never been able to successfully warm up a piece of pizza.  The edges usually are too hot to touch and definitely to hot to put in your mouth and the middle is still ice cold.   As for popcorn, if you are one second off of the “listening for between pops” some of the popcorn gets burned.  This results in the whole bag of popcorn tasting burnt and the whole house smelling like burnt popcorn for days.

10.)The vacuum cleaner isn’t sucking up any dirt when it is set on “Cleaning Tools.”  I have gone for months with the vacuum on this setting and have not realized it.

11.) An electric pencil sharpener is extremely noisy and inefficient.   A good old fashion hand-cranking pencil sharpener still works the best. BTW: I don’t use mechanical pencils because I push too hard and the lead constantly breaks.


This list goes on.   I know it is my own fault I am not gadget savvy.   In my defense I didn’t grow up with all these gadgets.   Kids today grow up surrounded by all this technology and they are so comfortable pushing buttons.  I actually think overall this is a good thing.  The only thing I take issue with is texting and driving.   That is some dangerous button-pushing in my opinion.


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2 Responses to A Gazillion Gadgets

  1. Deb Sheffield says:

    AMEN, sister!!!!! :o)

  2. Brenda says:

    I cannot turn my parents tvs on or off – they have to push certain buttons – in a certain order – on certain remotes. I just don’t get it. I didn’t think I was so challenged (simple) but it is beyond me why is all has to be so complicated!! You are not alone, Mickey….. lol.

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